The deal breaker
by irishfanficgal
Summary: Based in season three when Jax cheated on Tara. I didn't like how it was glossed over in the show. So here's my view of the whole story. I am terrible at summary's so give it a try!
1. Chapter 1

**Hello my fellow humans! I am new to the Sons fanfiction world, so please be gentle mmkay? Thank you and I hope you enjoy this story! It's set in season 3, when Jax cheated on Tara, with Ima. This is just my take on what should have happened, feel free to leave a review and tell me how you feel. OH! Tara does not yet know she is pregnant. First chapter is sloppy and very rushed, the rest of the story will be much slower, I just wanted this all to fit I guess. think that's all..  
Jax- Finally.  
Me- Shut up you bike loving-  
****Gemma- Jesus, don't have an argument on the first fuckin' chapter.****Me- *sighs* Fine. Sorry. Continue to read my story!**

**Chapter one.**

Tara felt numb as she took in the sight in front of her, Jax stretched out on the bed, and Ima leaning against the doorframe, wearing only Jax's t-shirt. Tara nodded and looked to Jax, the man she had once thought would never hurt her. "You wanted to push me away, you win. Sorry for interrupting your little... rendezvous" she says hollowly, and, pulling the door behind her closed, she walks to the exit of the clubhouse, ignoring the sympathetic eyes of the bikers she had began to consider family. She doesn't look back as she walks straight to the exit. Lyla stands up from Opie's lap, and follows her brunette friend while Gemma marches towards her son's room. She slams the door open, and glares frostily at Ima. "Get the FUCK out of my clubhouse right now" she snarls at the pornstar, who looks to Jax as if expecting him to defend her. He doesn't. "Fine. I got what I wanted anyway. He knows mine is the best pussy he's ever gonna have" Ima smirks, and Gemma grabs her by the hair, and drags her to the door, wearing only a bra and thong, no shoes. "Let me get my clothes first" Ima complains, and Gemma smirks. "Whores shouldn't wear clothes, it only makes the next fuck longer away" she spits and slams the door in the blonde's face, while marching back into her son's room.

"JACKSON TELLER! YOU ARE ONE STUPID FUCKING IDIOT! YOU BROKE THAT GIRL'S HEART!" Gemma yells, and Jax looks at her. "You have never supported Tara and me, why now?!" he demands, and her eyes narrow. "Because if not her, you'll go for someone like the pornslut I just threw out of here. At least Tara is a kind woman who can do more than suck a dick" Gemma tells him, and he looks down, avoiding his mother's eyes. "I had to, so I wouldn't hurt her" he says simply, and Gemma lets out a cold laugh. "You don't believe that. And she doesn't either. But well done, now she has no reason to stay around, and could just go back to Chicago right now" Gemma informs him, and his eyes widen as he shakes his head. "I don't need this Ma. I'll get Abel back, and everything will go back into place" he declares, as Gema shakes her head sadly, walking out of the room.

Back with Tara, Lyla had joined her and they were at Tara's dad's house, after they had just stopped at Jax's place to get Tara's stuff. Lyla had decided she was going to take Tara out to celebrate Lyla's decision to stop being a porn-star and do the other girls make up and costumes instead, and to make Tara cheer up about Jax. Tara had agreed, throwing caution to the wind. "I'll do your hair and make-up, and I'm loaning you a dress" Lyla announces and Tara suppresses the urge to groan. As Lyla sat down beside her on Tara's bed, she looked at the brunette. "Are you okay?" Lyla asks tenderly. "No, but I will be" Tara nods, and Lyla decides to stop prying.

As Lyla was doing her eye shadow, the doorbell rang. The women exchanged a look, and Tara shrugged. "I'll get it" she says, and walks to the door. She opens it to reveal Tig, who takes in Tara's current dressed state which was a white robe, and raises an eyebrow. "Lyla's bringing me out dancing, more like dragging" Tara explains. "SHE WANTS TO! PLUS THERE'S A FEW CUTE BARTENDERS WHO LOVE BRUNETTES AT THE BLACK CAT" Lyla yells from somewhere within the house, causing Tig to chuckle. "Well as hurt I am over not being invited to the party, I have some good news. Abel, we have located him. He's in Belfast. The guys are going in the morning to find him" Tig smiles and Tara puts a hand over her mouth in shock, and flings her arms around Tig. "Thank you for telling me" she whispers in his ear before she pulls away. "Not a problem. Wait did, did you say you were going to The Black Cat?!" Tig yelps, and Tara nods, crossing her arms over her chest. "Problem?" she asks, and Tig sighs. "Jax wouldn't like you going there" he explain, and the Tara's voice is cool as she answers. "Well Jax lost all right to care about where I was going, with whom, when he decided to fuck Ima" she snaps, and Tig raises his arms in defence. "Alright doc. Take care of yourself then" he chuckles, and walks to his bike.

"SHE'S GOING WHERE?!" Jax roars at the indifferent looking Tig. "Dancing, at the Black Cat. I told her you wouldn't like it, and her exact words were Jax lost all right to care about where I was going, with whom, when he decided to fuck Ima" Tig quoted, and Jax's face went pale. "She- She said that?" he asks in disbelief, and Tig nods. "Word for word". "I-I don't want her going there" he says, ignoring what Tara said. "If it makes you feel better, I don't think it's optional. Opie's old lady, she's one convincing woman" Tig chuckles throatily, as Jax starts to think. _She's just a little mad about Ima, that's all and when Abel's here, she'll be fine_ he confirms to himself, repeating it like a chant in his mind.

A few hours later, a beaming Lyla and an uncomfortable looking Tara are ready. Lyla is wearing a gold mini dress, one sleeve lon and the other not there, so it her shoulder was exposed, with gold heel and her her hair crimped. Tara was wearing a red dress that accented her chest, was skin tight, yet still somehow classy and these subtle strappy black stilettoes, her hair straightened out, she had her arms across her chest. "No, I'm not going" she decides and Lyla sighs. "But you promised! You have to or I'll be really sad" Lyla begs, using her puppy dog eyes. Tara attempts to ignore them, but visibly gives in, her shoulders slumping. "Fine let's go to your stupid club, and dance" she grumbles, and Lyla immediately perks up.

The club is positively buzzing with electric energy as the two women arrive, and get in straight away, mainly because Lyla knew the bouncer. "SHOTS!" Lyla yells, and as they go up to order, two good looking men come sidling over. "Hello ladies. Can we buy you a drink?" they taller of the two ask, as the shorter eyes up Lyla like she's a piece of meat. Tara opens her mouth to reject them when Lyla accepts. "Oh sure, c'mon over here" she winks, and within seconds, Tara is handed a red drink, that she recognises as vodka and cranberry juice. She warily takes a sip, and enjoys as the fruity liquid slides down her throat. In that moment she decides to let go of all the pain of that week, and just have fun.

The men, who reveal are Lenny and Fred, the taller being Lenny, also tell them they are gay and just buy women drinks so if some of their work buddies come clubbing it will appear they are straight. Tara enjoys their company, and as the night goes on, and the alcohol keeps flowing, she finds herself liking them more and more, all four exchanging numbers. "Care to dance guuurls" Fred slurs, and giggling, all four stumble to the dance floor. Lenny's eyes widen, as someone calls out his name. "LENNY! ANOTHER GIRL ON THE GO HUH?" a group of men yell over, and Lenny gives them the thumbs p, shooting Tara and Lyla apologetic looks. "Those the work buddies you talking about?" Tara asks, and the two men nod.

Lyla and Tara exchange a glance and a nod, grabbing Lenny and Fred, and pulling them off a little bit. "Let them watch this" Tara yells to Lenny over music, pressing herself to him, and dancing with him, swaying and sashaying her body all around his. He grabs her waist and joins in, and she sees Lyla and Fred do the same. Lenny presses his face into her neck, whispering his thanks into her ear. That's when they are violently yanked apart, and suddenly Lenny on the floor clutching his nose, and Jax is standing over him, looking positively murderous, Opie with him, glaring at Fred and Lyla, who have broke apart by now. "LENNY!" Tara yells, and kneels down beside him. "So, this is the guy you were telling me about. Nice right hook" he compliments weakly, and Tara glares at Jax. "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!" she yells. He doesn't answer, just stares at her and her dress, and she starts tugging at the hem, attempting to make it look less... Revealing. It doesn't work. Jax and Opie look at each other and nod, grabbing their individual partner. Lyla pulls away as does Tara. "I can walk" she hisses coolly, and turns around to the now standing Lenny. "I am so sorry about him. Please forgive me" she pleads and he holds up a hand. "Don't even mention it, all in the past" he smiles, and kisses her cheek.

Jax moves to hit him again, but Tara pushes him back. "You have done enough damage for now, don't you agree?!" she snaps, and walks away, Lyla walking after her. As they get out and turn as if to walk back to Tara's, Jax stops her. "I brought the truck. Get in. Both of you" he growls, and Lyla complies, but Tara crosses her arms. "I am capable of walking myself home Teller" she informs him, and his jaw tightens. "Get. In. The. Fucking. Truck. Now" he warns and she climbs in, Lyla sitting on the furious looking Opie. The ride back is tense, and the air awkward. It's when the four get into Tara's living room, where world war 3 breaks loose.

"WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING DANCING WITH THOSE CREEPS AT A PLACE YOU ARE FORBIDDEN FROM?!" Jax roars, as the door closes. Opie stands at his side, and looks to Lyla for her explanation. "I was having fun. You do not hold any right to forbid me from anywhere!" Tara answers. Lyla and Opie have gone into the kitchen and the sounds of their argument can be heard, slightly muffled. "I have every right to tell MY old lady where she cannot go" he tells her,, and she looks him in the eye. "But, I'm not your old lady. I'm not even your family" she reminds him, and he crumbles. "You will ALWAYS be my old lady" he says, and she rolls her eyes. "Until the next croweater wants you after we fight" she spits. "YOU WERE THE ONE PRACTICALLY FUCKING A GUY WHILE IN PUBLIC!" Jax accuses and Tara slaps him across the face.

"They were gay, and Lyla and I decided to help them act straight in front of their work buddies you ignorant bastard" she fumes, and his eyes widen. "Oh" is all he says. "So we are even?" he asks, and she scoffs. "You fucked someone else Jackson!" Tara yells, and he gets defensive. "I was pushing you away so you wouldn't get hurt" he says quietly. "No you were pushing me away because you were scared. Imagine if I had slept with Lenny tonight. Could you honestly tell me you'd be okay with the knowing he was inside me? Knowing our sweaty bodies were joined as he made me cum? Knowing another man has enjoyed my body while I was meant to be with you? Knowi-" Jax cuts her off with a kiss. "You. Are. Mine" he tells her, and she pushes him away. "I was. But that was a distant memory now" she says firmly, and she walks up the stairs, as he watches her in something akin to shock.

**SO that was chapter one... Whaddaya think? Do you think I should continue or just ... Delete and forgot about it? Tell me in PM or review :) Until later my lovelies.**

**DISCLAIMER- I do not own Sons of Anarchy, all rights go straight to the Genius that is Kurt Sutter. No profit is made from this story, entertainment purposes only.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Two chapters in two days? Uh, can I get a what what?! Oh my, guys thanks for all your lovely reviews, I was so happy when I read them, I was so happy, One guest gave me some advice on how to better my writing, and although this person told me to delete I guess I'm going to continue for all the people who want me to! I want to point out that this story is purely because it was buzzing in my head for the past few days, and I may not be the best writer ever, I write the way I write, and I am okay with that. I take all you guys suggestions though, they are very important to me! I did try to take this person's request into consideration while I was writing however, so I do try! This whole fandom is so welcoming so thank you, I love you all for being so supportive of a girl and her stupid little story. I enjoy writing this story, as I find the whole show's basis fascinating, and the chemistry between Jax and Tara so raw and believable. And don't get me started on how well each character is portrayed. Sorry, for droning on a lot there. Thanks gumdrops for reading through all that if you did.**

**Chapter 2.**

As Jax stands, still as a statue at the end of the stairs, Lyla comes out of the kitchen tears streaming down her face, Opie following here attempting to pacify her yelling. "I hope you have fun in Belfast, WE ARE SO FUCKING DONE" she screams at the regretful looking Opie. She storms past Jax, and pauses half way up the steps. She spins around and goes face to face with Jax and glares into his eyes hatefully. "This is for cheating on my friend" she smiles sweetly, and slaps him hard across the face. "Bastard. Burn in fucking hell" she spits, and waltz up into the same room Tara is in, and slams the door shut. Both men flinch at the impact. "We should be going, we have to pack" Jax says briskly, and Opie nods unsurely. "Yeah" he agrees hesitantly. And out of the door they walked.

"Do you think they are gone?" Tara asks, as they hear the roar of the truck engine coming to life. "Yeah, I think so" Lyla says, tears still falling. "What happened with you" they ask simultaneously. "Opie told me "once a porn slut always a porn slut" he thought I was going to sleep with them guys... How could he think that of me?! And I told him it's over. I don't want it to be over. I love him, and Ellie and Kenny! And Piper, he loves Opie like a dad! But he disrespected me and my old job!" Lyla tells her, and motions for Tara to continue her story.

"He said "I'm always gonna be his old lady" and I told him it was in the past. I don't even know anymore" she sighs, and Lyla grabs her arms. "You know what. You're my best friend. That I have ever had, and I'm sorry if that sounds tacky but it's true" she beams and Tara smiles shyly. "Yeah, you too. I'm not exactly what you can call popular, so I guess you are my best friend" she mutters, to the blonde's silent delight. "You know what we need. Sad movies, tissues and ice cream. Let's walk to the store" Lyla declares. "That's a great idea!" Tara agrees.

"This was probably not a great idea" Tara admits drunkenly as they both sit in a jail cell, Lyla hugging her packet of oreos to her chest and Tara a bottle of chocolate milk as Wayne Unser looks at them, . A not so amused look on his face, his arms crossed tightly across his chest, a frown gracing his features as he looks upon the two women in front of him in the cell.

"So the ice-cream snuck into your handbag?" he asks, and Lyla giggles. "Yess" she slurs. "Girls, I have heard some terrible excuses from some terrible liars, and Tara you and Jax were exceptions as you were the king and queen of excuses as youth, but god you've lost your touch" Unser jokes. Tara groans, as she lies back against the wall. "Who'd you call in?" Tara asks, and Lyla sits up. "PLEASE DON'T CALL MY MOM, SHE'LL KILL ME" she begs, and Unser shakes his head as Tara sighs. "Oh god what the fuck did you two do" a familiar voice sighs, and Tara turns to see Gemma standing on the other side of the bars. "Well doesn't this take me back" she smirks and Tara starts to laugh.

**Flashback- Jax and Tara are sixteen and were caught smoking pot by Unser.**

Jax was stretched out on the bench in the cell, Tara pulled in against his side. Unser comes into view, and he rolls his eyes. "In prison, prisoners are not meant to touch each other" he informs the young couple. "Technically we're in a holding cell, and I'm being held" Tara answers back, and Jax suppresses a chuckle. "If I didn't like you young lady" Unser smiles. "Where are they?!" Gemma's voice snaps, and comes stomping into view.

"If I EVER get a call at three in the fucking morning that you guys were smoking pot in public again... Be smart like normal teenagers and do it in your bedrooms" she tells them, and Unser clears his throat. "I'll act like I didn't hear that" he smiles. "Yeah, you do that. I'll sign them out or bail them or whatever the fuck it is" Gemma sighs, giving the comfortable looking teens a dirty look. "You two are cleaning all the bikes tomorrow. And the bar and you're organizing the garage. Oh this will be fun" she adds with a smirk, causing two protesting groans. "Ah ah ah. You broke the fucking law, you two deal with the consequences" Gemma informs them, as she follows the chief into his office.

**End flashback**

"Didn't you swear your law breaking days were over?" Gemma asks Tara.  
"I did, then I decides one more couldn't hurt. Sorry you got called to bail us out"  
"Well it was me or Jax, who is pissed off at this present minute"  
"Why?" Tara sighs, and Gemma looks at her as if she was slow. "Oh let me see. His son is missing, the love of his life hates him, and he has to go to Belfast to find his son" she says, and Tara drops Gemma's steely gaze. "Oh" was all she could think to say.

Lyla's not so quiet snores filled Gemma's car on the way back to Tara's. The biker matriarch bailed the two women out, and Tra and her now sat in a somewhat uncomfortable silence. "Your an old lady, you shouldn't leave your man over one crow eater" Gemma breaks the silence. "He cheated on me. He told me it was my fault Abel got taken. He told me I am not part of his family. HE pushed ME away. He told me Wendy was Abel's mother, not me. So yes. I am done. I am leaving. I was clearly never his old lady" she defends and Gemma gestures at her lower back.

"You keep the crow though. Why? Why not get it removed?! I'll tell you why. Because you and my son are it. You're the one fucking couple that gives others faith. I didn't like it when you came back, because someone having that much power over my baby threatened me and my place in his life, and I am sorry for that. I love you. Tell me you love me" Gemma demands, and Tara sighs, and turns to look at her. "I love you" she says honestly, and Gemma nods. "You're damn right you love me" she smirks, and sighs. "And can you tell me honestly you don't love Jax. If you can, I'll drop the subject. But only if you can look me in the eyes and say it truthfully" she finishes and Tara looks out the window. "I- He- It's complicated" she decides, and Gemma looks at her. "But you can't say you don't love him?" she presses on, and Tara groans. "I suppose I can't" she agrees, and a thoughtful silence follows.

"I want to say, I'm sorry. I should have stopped Ima from ever coming around the club" Gemma says, and Tara's head snaps up in shock. "No. It's not your fault. It's Jax and mine. I was stupid in trying to convince myself it could work. Now I'm going to go inside now, and go to bed. I will see you when you get back from Belfast, I'll stop over to see A-Abe-Abel" she stutters on the infant's name, her voice getting choked up. She wipes her eyes furiously, as she turns to shake Lyla awake. "C'mon Lyla we are home" she whispers, and shakes the blonde's arm. As the blonde begins to wake, Tara turns to talk to Gemma. "Thanks for the ride" she smiles, her eyes still slightly watery. She gets out of the car, and walks to the back door, opening it and assisting her drunk friend out of the car. "Bye Gemmaaa" Lyla slurs, as her head droops onto Tara's shoulder. "Need help with her?" Gemma offers, and Tara shakes her head. "I got her thanks" she says surely and makes her way towards the door. Gemma watches as she somehow gets the door opened, while supporting Lyla and gets inside with no hesitation, and shakes her head as she drives away. "Always was a stubborn kid" she mutters, as her car disappears down the darkened road.

**Hello my sweethearts! Thank you again for your kind reviews, I appreciated them immensely. I also appreciate anyone taking the time out of their day to read my story, I thank you kind sir or madam for doing it! If you enjoy this story, tell me in PM or a review, if you want. I tried to slow it down, perhaps I didn't do it well, but I'm okay with the end result I suppose. Thank you so much for reading my story I appreciate it more than you guys know! I love you all!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Ah my skittles, I can't believe I got 21 reviews... FOR TWO CHAPTERS?! Duuude. I feel loved. I am doing a very long chapter for all you guys, along with the 22 followers and 9 favourites! I never thought so many people would like it! I appreciate you guys reading, along with ANY other person reading and enjoying. THANK YOU FOR YOUR KINDNESS AND UNWAVERING SUPPORT YOU GUYS! I feel so blessed. I shall start trying to better my writing for those who don't like it, but to those who do, I thank you so much! This chapter took me so long to upload, as I have been studying for all these exams coming up on the seventh of February. Which I am shitting myself thinking about! Not literally shitting, but I'm terrified to take exams, I always freeze and just forget everything. But at least I can say I tried! Right? That's what counts to me, if someone actually tries I mean. But moving back to the topic of the story though! Hope you enjoy this chapter, I slowed it down! Finally I know. I know it had to happen. But yes you asked and I did it. For the person who said they wanted Tara to go to Belfast... I WANTED TO MAKE IT HAPPEN BUT I COULDN'T. Not much Jax in this one, but he shall come in the next chapter. And. There. Will. Be. Plenty. Of Jax I meant... Anyhoo enough of my boring ramblings, Continue reading on!**

**Chapter 3.**

Tara wakes up, her head pounding and her stomach churning. The sun coming in through the unclosed blinds, almost feels blinding to her hung-over eyes, and she hisses in pain as she averts her direct gaze from the window towards the person in bed beside her. Lyla is passed out alongside her, her blond hair a wild mane of tangles and her snores are loud enough to wake the dead. Tara cups her face in both hands and wipes at her eyes, as the events of last night register in her mind, and the almost arrest, she groans slowly. She sits up as she realizes the guys are probably gone to Belfast to get her- Jax's Abel.

She had been told quite clearly she was nothing to that kid, her heart crumples a little more at the memory of Jax telling her she wasn't his family. She wipes the tears threatening to fall from her eyes and clutches her stomach. The contents of which were making a desperate attempt at escaping her mouth. She gags as she runs for her bathroom, and pukes up what feels like pure acid. She sits back as she finishes, holding her head. She hears Lyla run down the hall, and moments later, the sounds of gagging fill the air. The thought causes Tara's stomach to churn. When Lyla finally stops, there's a few moments of silence. "Tara, are you okay?" Lyla calls out weakly.  
"No, I feel like I am the walking dead"  
"Same. Oh god my head"  
"Aspirin's in the kitchen"  
"I am not capable of walking that far" Lyla moans, and Tara slowly gets to her feet.

She flushes the toilet, and washes her hands and brushes her teeth. "Ugh" she sighs as she looks at her exhausted looking face in the mirror. _No wonder Jax found Ima more attractive _she thinks bitterly to herself and the tears threaten to spill, so she swallows the lump forming in her throat, and takes a deep breath to calm herself before she found herself having a breakdown. _Good, don't cry keep going, good_ her brain repeated as she walks out of her bathroom sluggishly, and heads straight to the kitchen. Lyla appears in the doorway, her eyes surrounded in dark shadows and her make up from last night smudged everywhere.

"Hey Tara, you got any tampons?" she asked curiously. "Oh yeah, here" she smiles, and leads Lyla to the bathroom and shows her where they were. As her blonde friend thanks her, Tara looks at the blue box of Tampax(**A/N Don't own this company, but thank whatever deity you believe in it exists :P)** and suddenly she freezes. She quickly does her calculations in her mind, and her eyes widen in slight horror as she comes to the realization.

"What's wrong?! Do you like have an allergy to tampons or something?!" Lyla asks in alarm, as she watches her friend. "I-I think I'm pregnant" Tara whispers in a hushed tone, and Lyla stares at her friend, trying to decipher her reaction. "And we are happy about this?" she inquires cautiously. "I'm ecstatic, just scared what the club will do IF I am pregnant, which I may not even be. I'm probably not even, just me being overly worried and all" Tara sighs, running a hand over her face.

"Take the test" Lyla demands, and Tara sighs. She had realized her chances of being knocked up a few hours ago, and Lyla had been plaguing her ever since to take a test, but she had refused. "Later" she says as they pull up to the clubhouse to pick up Piper, Kenny and Ellie. "Coming in? I'll need hhelp getting the kids stuff to stay at my mom's for the week" she tells her and Tara heaves a heavy sigh, and follows her way too perky to be hung-over friend into the place she detested.

The bar smelled like smoke and liquor, and her stomach began churning as the fumes almost became overwhelming. "hurry up here please, I am going to fucking hurl" she warns Lyla, who nods and calls the kids names from the doorway. They all come barrelling in the door, hugging Lyla. "Hey Tara" Ellie greets her, Kenny waves, and Piper flashes her a big smile. "Hey kids, you excited to visit Lyla's mom?" she asks, and Piper nods, while the other two remain quite withdrawn. "We're not sure she'll like us" they explain quietly so Lyla can't hear. "Of course she will! What's not to like. You guys will love her, trust me. You two? Are some pretty fricking lovable kids" she smiles warmly, and the two seem to perk up considerably. "So guys, we got our bags packed?!" Lyla asks, and all three nod, and point to their bags by the door.

After the kids were dropped out to Lyla's mom's, Tara and Lyla are sitting in Tara's kitchen staring at the pregnancy test. "How long has it been" Tara asks solemnly, and Lyla checks. "It's time" she nods slowly, and Tara closes her eyes. "Like ripping off a Band-Aid. Nice and quick" she whispers, and with trembling hands, picks up the test. She looks into her friend's eyes, and slowly drags her gaze onto the little white stick. A little pus sign was visible. "I'm... I'm pregnant" she confirms, and her hand goes to her stomach. "I'm pregnant" she repeats, and begins to laugh as tears fall. Lyla hugs her. "You're pregnant" she smiles, and Tara stares at her stomach in awe and shock. "I have a baby in my belly. I am growing a person" she takes a deep breath and smiles. "I'm pregnant".

Meanwhile, on a plane on the way to Ireland, Jax sat looking out the window, staring at nothing in particular. He was so deep in thought he didn't hear Gemma lean over to him. "Alright baby?" she asked, touching his arm in concern. "Worried about Abel" he immediately replied, and Gemma nods, pretending she accepted that answer. "How's Ope doing?" Jax asks, as he gestures to his best friend since birth, who's asleep behind him, his snores louder than a bulldozer **. **"He'll live. Lyla will take him back. But the kids are going to Lyla's mother's or something for the week anyway, so she'll have time to process everything, and be there for Tara. You know how girls are with this stuff. Hopefully they are planning on not getting arrested again" she chuckles, and Jax shoots her a questioning look, raising an eyebrow. Gemma shifts around uncomfortably and clears her throat.

"Oh well last night, I got a call from a drunk Lyla saying that her and Tara got arrested, and she needed me to bail them out of the jail cell. I went because I want Tara to know I don't hate her and because they sounded so fucking wasted I knew they would just have got themselves into more fucking trouble which is exactly the opposite of what everyone needs right now... And you were busy with making the travel and plane plans, so I didn't think you'd want to know that Tara got arrested. It was Unser so he's not going to put it on his record. The store owner said he's willing to let it go so it wasn't a big deal or anything" she shrugs, and Jax stares at his mother in something akin to horror or anger, perhaps both.

"She got arrested while being drunk and didn't even tell me?! Not even a fucking phone call, or a fucking text. Like _Oh hey it's Tara. By the way got arrested last night and your mom bailed me out_ or something like that?! Fuck sake. What the hell did they even do?" he demands, and Gemma smiles wryly. "They, in their drunken haze, decided to pull off grand theft fucking ice cream" she says amused and Jax slightly smiles, as Gemma turns to look him in the eyes. "But now baby, why would you care? Why should she have texted you, or let you know. You slept with another woman. You told her she's not your family, so you should be happy she's not chasing you desperately am I right?" Gemma asks, and sits back down properly as Jax runs a hand over his face, as he goes back to staring out the window, lost again in his thoughts and knowing that every single thing his mother had just said was right, but not wanting to actually admit it out loud to anyone, not even himself, just yet.

**So you like?! Sorry it's so rushed and all, I have been up to my eyeballs in study. *shudders*. I hope someone reads this and enjoys it, that would probably make me cry with happiness. Don't mock me! I can't hear my cat miaowing, which normally indicates he's after doing something wrong. Who bets he's after using my bed as a scratching post again or NOOOO made a bed in my clothes drawers. NOT THE SHIRTS AGAIN! This surprisingly has happened before. Although I am an amazing cat owner. He secretly loves me... I don't know how this Author's note turned to the intriguingly adorable subject of felines and their habits of making beds out of people's new shirts and sweatpants, but yes. Back to my nerdy appreciation of all you readers. Thanks for taking the time out of your day to read my story, I really appreciate you (yes YOU READING THIS NOTE RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT IN TIME, I AM TALKING TO YOU) clicking on it, to read most likely out of boredom, or maybe it sounded interesting or something I don't know ... But I'm still grateful. Well I have nothing more to say except I like pickles, and my house has not one pickle. Which should be illegal. But somehow isn't. Alright before I start rambling, BYYYYYYYYE AND HERE'S A COOKIE (::) LOVE YOU!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my readers! How is everyone this FINE day?! Me? I'm amazing, thank you very much! Guys, let's talk for a minute... 32 FRICKING REVIEWS, 13 FAVOURITES AND 30 FOLLOWERS?! Holy shit, you guys when I first thought of this story, I never believes it would get any attention. And everyone here is so nice and warm. Not like, you are physically too warm or anything.. I mean... Ugh you know what I mean! Have a good week and if it's a bad week, you take a deep breath, look at yourself in the mirror and say "Some random chick on the internet who writes fanfiction believes in me, and I believe in me". It's that simple honey! Now I am skipping the guys searching for Abel, because that was never my main storyline. I am sorry if this choice upsets you or anything, but it's the way I needed it to go... Sorry if you don't like it! Love you! Enjoy this chapter my precious little gummy bear!**

**Chapter 4- TWO WEEKS LATER**

"Tara wake up! Gemma's on the phone yelling at me to wake your lazy ass up" Lyla roars, as a comatose Tara shoots up into a sitting position. "WHa- What.. Oh give me the damn phone" she snaps, and snatches the phone out of the amused looking blonde girl's hands.  
"Hello?!"  
"Hey honey. How you doing?"  
"Gemma, not that I have a problem with you not hating me now and all, but why the fuck are you calling me and yelling at Lyla?!"  
"Oh shut the fuck up, you are fine, oh and I am fine over here, thanks for fucking asking. But, anyway I needed to call and you needed to hear the news"  
"What news?! Are the guys all alright?!  
"The guys are fine, hold on I have to put you on to someone" Gemma said happily, and Tar begins to fidget nervously as all the terrible scenarios run through her mind. Then the familiar voice comes through the phone. "Tara?!" Jax asks, and Tara almost hangs up. Almost. "Yes Jax, your mother told me there is something you wanted to tell me?" she asks, silently thanking whatever was up there that Jax wasn't dead. "We got him. He's back. I'm coming home. We're coming home" he corrects himself happily, and tears begin to fall down Tara's face, as she breaks out into a grin. "Oh my... Thank fuck I was so worr-" she cuts herself off, and pauses. "I'm happy you found your son Jackson. Truly, I'm very happy for you" she continues in a detached voice.

Jax frowns as he hears her and looks down at the baby in his arms. "He misses his mom" he tells her, and he hears her sharp intake of breath. "But I'm not his mom remember? I'm just his former doctor really" she says bluntly, and Jax's heart rips into shreds as he hears her say those words. "Tara" he pleads, silently begging she would tell hhim to bring their son home to her. "I really am happy for you Jax. I hope I'll see A-Abe-Abel when you come back" she hints, and he can hear the tears in her voice. "I want.. Tara please don't" he tries to get the words out. "Goodbye Jax. Give that little boy a hug from me" she cries, and hangs up, leaving Jax standing in his room in Belfast with a half packed suitcase, a baby who was squirming around in his arms and a broken heart.

"Listen here little man" Jax starts talking to Abel as he sits down on the edge of his bed. "I royally fucked up with your mommy. Probably shouldn't curse around you, sorry. But I did. And we have to get her back, because Daddy is a big idiot who hurt mommy really bad, and made her very sad" as Jax continues talking to the baby he feels the guilt and remorse wash over him "Daddy slept with another lady, to make mommy want to go away. And he did a way more stupid thing. He told mommy she wasn't our family, when we both know she is the centre of it, right kiddo?" Jax stops to examine Abel's features, and finds him staring at him intently.

"So we have to get Mommy to come back, because before you were born, mommy went away for a long time. And daddy was so sad, and so was mommy. So we can't let that happen again son, because you'll be sad to. Right kid?" Jax finishes, and Abel stares at him still, as if trying to communicate. "I'll take that as a yes. Because we need to get your mom to forgive me now Abel and I'll need you to help" he tells the kid, and hugs him tightly to his body. "I missed you so much kid, as so did mommy" he whispers, and continues packing with one hand.

Tara begins to shake as she hangs up the phone, and Lyla is at her side instantly. Tears slide rapidly down her cheeks, and she tells Lyla the contents of the phone call. "So They found Abel and they are all coming back? That's good at least! But what about the baby. I mean, everyone's kind of guessing, especially with those tank tops you were. Are you going to tell Jax you're pregnant... Or holy shit, are you like even going to let him in the kid's life?" Lyla quizzes her, and her frown deepens. "Of course I'm going to let him be part of the baby's life. I may not be part of his family, but this baby is mine, and he cannot take that away from me. I may not have a biological claim to Abel, and I thought he cared about me more than he did, but I'll be damned if he tried to discredit my connection to this child. So he can be part of the baby's life, he can see our kid anytime he wants, but he can't tell me I am not the baby's family" she says in a final tone.

"If he does I'll bust a cap in his ass" Lyla promises, causing her crying friend to giggle. The phone's shrill ring makes both girls jump. Tara picks it up. "Hello?" she asks, shrugging at Lyla who's mouthing who is it.  
"YOU'RE FUCKING PREGNANT AND I HAVE TO HEAR IT FROM THE MOTHERFUCKING OWNER OF THE GROCERY STORE?!" Gemma's angry voice roars through the voice, causing both girls to wince.  
"Well I was planning on telling you when you got back" Tara offers weakly, and Gemma scoffs.  
"You should have told me first. I had to find out when Betty called and tells me she's happy to hear the good news of me being a grandma again. I almost collapsed out of shock!" she tells Tara, who's staring at her hands.  
"I'm sorry. I truly was going to tell you the minute you landed, I swear"  
"You are so fucking lucky I believe you. DOES JAX KNOW BECAUSE IF HE FUCKING DOES I'LL MURDER HIM" Gemma asks indignantly.  
"No, no he doesn't. And I would appreciate you not telling him" Tara begs, and Gemma smirks.  
"I won't... IF you come to clubhouse tonight for Abel's homecoming party. Come on, go with Lyla and you can stay with her all night I swear" Gemma coaxes her, and Tara heaves a heavy sigh.  
"Fine. I'll be there. But I swear one word about Jax, and I am walking straight out of there" she warns before hanging up. She turns to Lyla. "So we are going to a party tonight" she tells her, and Lyla's eyes light up.

Later that night, the girls are ready and on their way to the club. Gemma had called and told them to be dressed up, and Lyla had taken that and ran with it. She wore a mid-thigh light blue tight dress, that hugged her curves and made her seem elegant and sexy all at once. Tara had been forced into a black and white number, the white corset like top with black swirls, and tutu like material flowing to well above her knee, really hid her bump well. "When I said party, I didn't mean for to Barbie me up" Tara sighed, and Lyla glared at her. "Gemma said dressed up. We. Dressed. Up" she says lowly and Tara raises her hands in surrender.

As the car pulls up, and the scene registers in Tara's mind, the butterflies begin in her stomach at the thought of seeing Jax. She sees a lone motorbike, and recognises it as the Dyna Wide glide, a Harley of course. She rubs her belly nervously as she steps out of the car. Lyla links their arms, and they walk into the clubhouse. The music is playing, the alcohol is flowing and the crow-eaters are stalking their prey. Nothing new there then. Tara and Lyla stand near the door as they look for Gemma in the crowd. "Ah Doc, you made it! And Lyla, too! Looking good ladies, if you weren't already claimed I'd ask you to be my own old ladies" Tig chuckles, and Lyla smacks his arm as Gemma appears. "We are both actually free agents, for your information!" Lyla tells him dryly, and Gemma's eyes narrow. "Not one of the two of you are free agents" Tig tells them, and walks chuckling. "FREE AGENTS?!" Gemma yells, and Lyla shrugs. "It's technically the truth" Tara points out. Gemma sighs heavily, and mutters something about goddamn hormonal kids.

"Give me a hug, before your stomach explodes into a humungous bump and it's awkward" Gemma chuckles and Tara hugs her tightly. "In a way, I missed you the most" Tara tells her, and Gemma smirks. "That's bullshit and we both know it" she laughs, and takes a sip of her drink. "You are not to so much as look at a drink for the next nine months. I already had one grandbaby almost poisoned, not letting it happen to this one too" Gemma warns her, and Tara nods. "I wouldn't do it. You know that already" Tara tells her, and Gemma nods. "I know baby" she smiles, and then it happens. "Tara?! You made it!" Jax's voice cuts through the air, and she sucks in a strangled breath, and turns around slowly and stiffly, her hand protectively laying on her stomach, as she took in Jax standing in front of her, holding Abel proudly. Gemma places a hand on her shoulder and nods. "Tell him" she whispers into Tara's ear. "Tell me what?" Jax asks, as Abel begins to fuss in his arms.

**I apologize for the cliffhanger, but muah haha, I had to... It adds flair! And suspense... PLUS IT'S SUPER FUN TO DO! Sorry that I'm not actually very sorry at all... Hehehe. Thank you for reading. And I hope you enjoyed it. Will Jax find out about the baby?! Oh, imagine being pregnant. I mean you are growing a person. TECHNICALLY that means we as human women, are trees... Baby trees. Awww can imagine how adorable/creepy they would be?! Aww... And AHHH... At the same time! ... Wait sorry now is not the time to talk about babies growing on trees... Now is the time to thank you for your continued support and all, it means so much like you don't even know guys. Thank... You... So... Much. MUCHAS GRACIAS. MERCI. go raibh maith agat(Oh yeah I speak languages). Love you for reading guys!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello my people How have to fuck have you been guys?! This story is getting so much fucking positive attention, it's just so fucking weird and crazy. I don't even know... L... Just..Shit... What... I ... THANK YOU! If you are reading this, I love you so much for giving me and my fucking story a chance! Gah This whole thing is making me go all fucking soft and mushy! I apologize again for the cliffy but goddamn it was fun to do, I'm not even going to lie to you right now! And may I say one thing... DRAMA in this chapter right here (obviously). Oh and someone asked if I was going to send the guys to jail, and I am leaving it up o you guys! I honestly hadn't thought about that fact, planning on just winging it but this makes it more fun for me, to see all of your extremely creative ideas that nobody else would ever think of, because you are all such beautiful souls! Tell me if you want them to or not, in a review, oor better yet PM me and we can fangirl over Sons together, which is just the best idea ever! Yeah, That sounds fucking cool! I highly doubt anyone reads these authors notes, but if you do, you are awesome. Enjoy this one, my beautiful darling!**

**Chapter 5.**

"Tell me what?!" Jax repeats, and Tara doesn't reply. closing her eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath, before instead scanning over Abel for any visible marks, or bruising, or any injury at all, as he starts crying out crankily. "Do you want to hold him?" Jax asks, his tone soft and understanding, and she nods slowly, suddenly way too choked up to speak properly. He hands her the crying baby, that precious little boy who had already been through so much, softly and she hugs him to her immediately, his crying stopping almost instantly, as his wide eyes examine her curiously, his face breaks out into a gummy smile and he happily starts gurling. Tara almost dissolves into sobs right there, but becomes determined to stay strong in front of Jax. "He recognizes you" Jax's deep voice breaks into her thoughts, and she half smiles at Abel, not in any way at all responding to Jax's comment. "So what was that thing you had to tell me?" he asks softly, and Tara's head shoots up from Abel, to stare at Jax in a daze.

She takes a shaky breath, and shifts Abel slightly in her arms, as she clears her throat awkwardly. "Well, um there's no easy way to say this at all, so I think I am going to just come right out with it, like tearing off a band-aid. Jax I have to tell you that... Well... I'm p" she cuts herself off slowly, as the club falls weirdly silent. She, along with Jax, follows everyone's gaze, to the blonde smirking porn star that is Ima, who was after arriving through the door. "I swear I did not know Tara" Jax gasps, but she ignores him, and just as Tara turns her full undivided attention back to Abel, and just as Gemma and Lyla appear next to her, each on one side flanking her, glaring viciously at Ima, who is strutting towards them. "Oh you decided to stay then? Not get Jax's obvious message about your pussy being too boring and used up for him? Maybe he needs some real hot fucking, or did he get his fill with me" Ima drawls confidently, and Tara continues to hum a nursery rhyme to the beloved baby cradled gently in her arms, seemingly not hearing the blonde who is trying to aggravate her. Gemma and Jax exchange a worried glance, as both turn their attention to Tara, who seems to have entered her own world.

"Oh, I see. You decided I was the big bad whore, who seduced your man into fucking the crap outta me. Well honey, it was the other way around. HE told ME he wanted to fuck me. HE told me that he wanted to be inside MY pussy. Bet he didn't tell you that little fact huh?" Ima smirks, and Tara finally tears her attention from Abel, albeit slightly unwillingly. "Gemma? Will you take Abel please?" she asks sweetly, and Gemma gently grabs the baby, cuddling him to her chest as she continues to watch Tara intently. The brunette turns to her right, completely ignoring the situation and looks to Lyla. "Lyla I'm going home, are you coming?" she asks slowly, ignoring the victorious looking Ima, who had a shit eating grin on her face and Lyla nods, still glaring at the blonde porn star.

"You don't have to go. Please stay, don't leave" Jax interjects pleadingly, and Tara doesn't even acknowledge that she heard im speak. She turns to walk away when Ima decides to take one more below the belt shot. "Oh let me guess. You told him about you being knocked up with his kid and he stayed with you out of pity?! He sure didn't do that with the other fucking crank-whore's kid. If his first one didn't matter to him, what makes yours so fucking special huh, doctor bitch. You blackmailing him into staying with you, you pathetic little prude?!" Ima yells viciously, and Gemma moves to lunge before remembering she held her baby grandson, and quietly settled for angrily stewing clutching Abel tightly, glaring daggers at Ima.

Tara slowly walks back to Ima. She raises her hand and punches her right in the face, so hard it causes the other girl to fall down to the ground, clutching her face. Tara yanks her back up to her feet by her hair, and holds her so she's staring into her eyes. "You. Had. No. Right. I hadn't told anyone anything, you bitch. And that baby is fucking more special at his little age, than you will EVER be in your whole miserable life. You do not insult my- Jax's son like that. And I am not blackmailing ANYONE, you psycho. Jax and I are not together. You are welcome to him. You had him while I was with him, so why not now when he's a single guy? But you Had absolutely NO right to fucking do this" Tara states to the terrified looking blonde, looking eerily calm.

Jax stares wide eyed at the scene in front of him. Tara was pregnant with his baby?! Him and Tara were going to biologically have a kid together? The thought made his heart flutter with excitement, until he realized she had basically just said nothing was between them. His brow furrows, and suddenly anger starts bubbling to the surface. If Ima had not showed up, Tara would have told him, and he could have hugged her, maybe even kissed her. And she said Abel wasn't her son. Well that was his fault, he admits with a lot of regret. _Why am I such a fucking idiot. _

Tara releases Ima's hair, and steps back. She looks around the club at all the familiar faces, all who look impressed and proud. She slowly meets Jax's gaze, and isn't surprised to find anger there. She sighs, and nodding to Gemma, turns on her heel and marches out of the club. Lyla follows along, as does Jax and Gemma. She stops at the door, and turns to the club members at the bar. "Sorry to interrupt your party" she smiles sincerely and they all wave hands dismissively. "You weren't the disruption doc, that bitch was" Chibs says, gesturing towards Ima. "And don't worry I'll be doing the shots for you and the baby for nine months" Tig winks jokingly. "A difficult job, that you will do with great difficulty I am sure" Tara smirks, and grabbing Lyla's hand, walks out through the door.

Jax finally regains composure enough to stride out after her. "What the hell was that?! You're pregnant?!" Jax yells, and she stiffens and turns quite woodenly. "That was me sticking up for your son. And yes, I am. I was trying to tell you when your old lady showed up and told you for me" she answers, and Jax's eyes narrow. "Abel is OUR son, I pretty much guessed you were, and she is NOT my old lady. You are" he hisses, and Tara blinks at him blankly. "I was. Until you told me I wasn't family, and you decided to fuck her. Look I am too tired to do this tonight, I can't argue with you. Not tonight. I am exhausted, pregnant and emotional, and I can't do this tonight" she sighs, her voice sounding defeated and worn out, causing Jax to slightly wince.

"I don't want to fight" he says softly, and her eyes drift up to meet his gaze. "I know" she says simply, and he looks hopeful. "I it to go back to the way it was, the way it should be. Me and you, with Abel and baby, just us in our little bubble. Just our little family, perfect the way it is" he whispers longingly, his hand reaching out to stroke her cheek softly. She leans in to his gentle loving touch for a minute, and then slowly backs away. "I know you do" she sighs, and look to her car, which Lyla is sitting in patiently, though anxiously watching the couple's exchange wearily.

"I have to go. I need to just ... Think. I can't do that here, because I am so angry at you for breaking my heart, and myself for still loving you in spite of that fact. I can't be near you and think, because when I'm near you all logic is out thhe fucking window and all caution is thrown in the fucking wind. I can't do this. I just I can't be here. I'll see you.. Around Jax. We always have the beautiful memories right?" she sighs, and walks to the car dejectedly. As she pulls out of the lot, he falls to his knees, running his hands through his hair. "I don't want to just be a memory" he whispers, as he feels the weight of the situation finally upon his shoulders.

**I don't even know if this is good or not. I'm barely awake, and I feel like I am just going to fall asleep. Sorry if you disliked it, I really honestly tried. I have been studying so hard recently, it's not even funny. If you did like, thank you! If you didn't, I guess I apologize! I am so very sorry for it's shortness, I am just so tired it's not even funny. Plus I fucked up with one of my friends, and she may hate me now... I hope not, but it's life, you know what I mean? Of course you do, you genius, although imagine if all of the people in the WHOLE UNIVERSE said Fuck at the exact same time. That... should be a thing. Like an international bonding experience! Ah, this is why I am going to be an international Supreme Overlord of the Universe one of these days extremely very soon... Is extremely very correct?! I think so. Yeah, let's just say it is... NOW Thank you if you have reviewed, favourite and or followed this whole story. I cannot express how much it means to me, I love you all so much, even if you are READING this story, I just love you so much! Thank you guys, for being so fucking awesome, and again, for giving my story a shot! THANK YOU ! Next update shall be soon!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello my darling reader! How is your beautiful self doing on this surprisingly fine evening?! Me, you may ask out of politeness? I am supremely stressed at this present moment in time, for these stupid exams I have to take coming up on Wednesday. So I have something to inform you of. I am telling you guys now, I won't be updating during these exams as I shall be rushed off my feet every moment, and they end the day before Valentine's, so I shall TRY to update tomorrow or Tuesday, but I unfortunately have no set promises. So sorry you guys who like the story, if I ould I truly would! Anyway, GUYS ARE YOU SERIOUS?! 51 reviews, 41 Followers, and 16 favourites? Are you kidding me? This is crazy. You are all crazy, and I love you for it! This chapter is the start of Jax cleaning up his fucking act, but something does happen to add a twist (because I just ouldn't resist it). Finally though, about cleaning up his act, am I right?! Um, I have been thinking about it, and I don't THINK I am going to do the guys going to jail, but I may still change my forever unsure mind. Huh, the perks of being an author. Thanks to those who gave me suggestions, I am taking them all into consideration, and trying to shape them so they shall fit in with the story line itself. Thanks for reading, you amazing human being!**

**Chapter 6.**

Pain. Regret. Guilt. Self hatred. These were just some of the terrible feelings haunting Jax Teller as he stood in his infant son's doorway, watching the treasured little boy as he slept. So, so innocent and untainted by all the ugliness and hurt he had already been through in his short small life. He thanked whatever higher power that is out there for every breath that kid takes, but he knows he needs his mother. Jax's heart drops as it hits him, Tara may never stand with him, watching their son sleep soundly, like any new parents with their baby. The pain in his chest doubles as he imagines some other man stand with Tara, putting his and Tara's baby to sleep, singing slightly out of tune lullabies softly under his breath. The simple thought alone is enough to make Jax's stomach tie into little angry knots. But, he realizes, if he doesn't step up and gain back Tara's trust and forgiveness, then it may very well just become a reality.

He suddenly gets hit with the haunting image of his kid calling someone else "daddy". If she had a boy, images of some other man teaching him to play catch, and how to cycle a bike. Is Tara had a girl, he smiles a little at the thought of a mini Tara, the thought of some other asshole scaring off any potential interested boys, or protecting Jax's little girl as if she was theirs, made him want to punch something. He shudders, some other man thinking Tara was _theirs. _Tara was his, as was any future babies she ever would have. End of the fucking story. He flinches, as if in actual physical pain, as he realizes she doesn't WANT to be his. He may crave for her, yearn for her acknowledgement, and be in awe of her existence, but she may not want him. Soon, she won't even NEED him, and he wouldn't, couldn't, let that happen.

With Tara, she was walking into the hospital when one of her fellow residents, Cathy, came running up to her. "I need you to do me a favour. I have to scrub in on a surgery, and I need someone to take my place covering the pit" the perky blonde begs, looking desperate. "Oh sure, I am not even on call, just wanted to stitch up someone or fix some sick person" she smiles, and Cathy flings her arms around her. "Thank you!" she whispers, and lets Tara go, running off in the opposite direction. Tara pulls her hair up into a ponytail, as she makes her way towards the emergency room.

After stitching up an eight year old's arm, giving two flu shots, and assured a middle aged man he ahd not broke his foot, but had merely slightly sprained it, Tara felt back to normal. It was here she was comfortable, she was a queen in this small kingdom, knowing the cure to nearly all these people's ailments. There was no "your Jackson Teller's old lady" to make these people respect her, she required merely her skills at the field of medicine, which she thankfully had plenty of. And just as she believed it was all going to be okay, somehow, she heard an extremely familiar voice. "Tara? Oh thank god, will you be like my doctor please?" Wendy begged, and Tara turned to see the blonde ex wife of Jax. "Um, yes, right this way" she lead them to an exam room, for the added privacy from the ever prying eyes at the hospital.

"I am so glad I ran into you, I heard all about Abel. Is he okay?!" Wendy begged, as she took a seat on the bed in the room. Tara recapped the full situation to Wendy, from the kidnapping to recent events, pausing for a deep breath as she realized tears were falling down her cheeks. "And Wendy, I am so sorry I didn't do more to protect him. You have every right to hate me right now, I hate me right now. I am so sorry I didn't protect your son better" she sighs miserably. Tara expects the blonde woman to slap her but she does the exact opposite. She pulls the brunette doctor into a firm hug. "Tara, I am SO sorry. I don't hate you, and I sure as hell don't blame you. As much as this pains me to say, Abel.. Isn't my son. he's yours. Now that doesn't mean I don't want to be involved with him, I do, I just know that while I biologically gave birth to him, you've been more mom to that kid than I could ever be" Wendy admits, and Tara looks at her while they pull out of their embrace.

"I wish I was but Jax made it pretty clear he doesn't think I am anything to him or Abel. Now why are you in the hospital?!" Tara turns the topic back to origin, and switches to her professional tone. Wendy looks down at her knees, smiling slightly. "I think I have a sprain or something fucked up in my shoulder, and my girlfriend Jenny told me I should get it checked out" she says slowly, and Tara raises her eyebrow. "Girlfriend?" she asks, as she motions for Wendy to remove her jacket, which she does wincing. "Yeah. We met in rehab. Never thought I would be in love with a woman, but man she came at me like a storm. So Jax won't be cheating on you anytime soon with me or anything" Wendy says jokingly, and Tara stiffens.

"What?" Wendy asks clearly worried, and Tara shrugs. "Oh he cheated with a porn star named Ima" Tara mumbles, and Wendy's eyebrows raise. "That asshole. We should form a "Jax Teller sucks" club" she suggests, and Tara snorts with laughter, and Wendy joins in. "See there you go. You got a nice laugh doc" Wendy informs her, and Tara raises an eyebrow. "Coming on to me Ms Case?" she asks teasingly, and Wendy rolls her eyes. "Jenny would kill me if I was" she snorts, and Tara smirks. "No denial I see" Tara points out, and Wendy flips her off. They continue chatting for a few moments, before a gunshot echoes.

The two women dive under the bed, and look up, seeing a man standing in the middle of the pit, screaming at a pale nurse, while he was holding a gun to her head. A man lay on the ground, blood omitting from the gunshot in his stomach. Tara gasps as her hand flies protectively to her stomach. Wendy notices this action and her eyes widen. "You're pregnant?!" she whisper yells, and Tara nods slowly. Then she makes out what the shooter is saying. "I want someone close to the Sons of Anarchy. An old lady, a mother hell a fucking prospect will fucking do. ANYTHING" the man is yelling, and Tara stands up shakily. "What the hell do you think you are fucking doing have you gone completely crazy?!" Wendy whispers screams at her angrily. "No I am not crazy. But I am saving every person in this hospital from danger" Tara says briskly and professionally, and before Wendy can grab her to stop her from her actions, she marches out the door. "I am Jax Teller's old lady" she announces calmly to the shooter, and he turns his full undivided attention onto her. "I need proof" he demands crankily, and she instantly hikes up her scrubs to reveal the crow on her back. "Satisfied" she sighs, and he nods.

"Well, well, well. It's time for introductions" he smirks in a manic kind of way, and she continues to fight to remain calm. "I am Tara Knowles, a doctor here and begging you to take me as a hostage or whatever you need, and leave all these people go on unharmed" she says coolly, and he seems to takes in her point and nods. "I'll need another, for extra advantage" he demands snappily, and to Tara's utmost horror, she hears Wendy. "Take me. I'm Jax's ex wife" Wendy yells, and Tara's eyes widen in fear as she shakes her head. "No, I promise you don't need to take anyone else" she swears desperately and the man takes it into consideration again. "No we stay here. I will get the ransom off the police and SAMCRO" the man smirks, sadistically. "SAMCRO will know never to fuck with Hector Salazar again" he chuckles evilly.

**So how do you like it?! I know it's rushed and sloppy but I was desperate to update so I apologize honey! I wasn't going to simply skip over the Salazar moment or anything so I tried to put a twist on it, and I think it worked. Someone asked for Wendy to come back, so here you go I delivered on that aspect at least! I did try and I think I did okay. I made Tara and Wendy kind of bond in this chapter, because I always thought they would work very well as friends. Many have commented on how interesting my take on Tara and Lyla's friendship is, and I have an explanation. Lyla and Tara just gradually became closer as their husbands got more and more involved in the club, leaning on each other subconsciously for some form of understanding and support I suppose. It's the way it played out in my head anyway. You guys can imagine whatever you want, that just seemed pretty good for an explanation I guess. Anyway. I don't plan on giving up on this story, as in my mind it has so many potential storylines, and endings. You may ooh and aah. No? Okay then *stands awkwardly in the corner* So thank you AGAIN for reading this story, it makes me feel like I'm not a totally bad writer I suppose, or something. (sorry I am awkward and I know it). So I shall go before I say something supremely embarrassing about myself and creep everyone out by the awkwardness that is my life. I will talk to you soon people! GOODBYE FOR NOW SUPREMELY AWESOME HUMAN WHO LIKES TO READ FANFICTION!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello my lovelies! I know I said no updating during the exams, but I am awfully sick at this moment, and seeing as I'm miserable and in bed, I decided to update my story for my amazing people on this site! I was going to update yesterday, but I was just too tired. Fucking sucks, but you know. Anyway, this chapter took me a while to do, mainly because I have been busy with some personal shit lately, and have come to the realization I can't be there for everyone, although I will keep trying. The stress of these issues, have caused serious writer's block, which anyone who has experienced it can tell you, is just a pain is the ass. Anyway, sorry to sound so down and not upbeat. But guys, 64 REVIEWS?! 49 FOLLOWERS?! 22 FAVOURITES?! Jaysus lads, you are all so fucking nice and really give me inspiration! Some of ask the most intriguing questions, and the most creative suggestions for the course of this story. It makes me happy to read all your reviews, and feel free to drop me a PM if you want something explained, or simply even to talk. I'm always here for people (except when I am sleeping... Which I shall not lie is a lot. Hwey not judge I like me my beauty sleep). **

**Chapter 7.**

Tara felt her heart speed up as she subtly did a head count of how many people were in the area. Four nurses, two residents, seven adults and six children. Nineteen possible fatalities. Twenty one including herself and Wendy. Twenty two, if you counted her unborn baby. She rubbed her belly as she wracked her brain for a possible way out of her dilemma. She frantically attempts to think of the solution, as she tries to talk to her captor.

"Hector was it? I'm Tara, as you know, and these people don't need to be here. These nineteen people have lives outside of here, would you really want their innocent blood on your hands?" she asks, knowing the words immediately impacted him. Wendy stood next to her, and gestured around. "I mean come on dude, there are kids here for Christ's sake" Wendy points out pleadingly, and Salazar nods slowly as he stands up, holding his gun tightly. "Alright, all of those not directly affiliated with SAMCRO get the hell out. NOW" he yells, and the other hostages bustle towards the exit, as they cast worried glances back at Tara and Wendy. The door closes tightly behind them. "Call your dear old man" Salazar chuckles darkly.

Jax was just after busying himself with some papers for the garage, shit Gemma should be handling. He groans as he realizes he doesn't understand half the language on the sheet._ Tara would know what it all means, _his mind reminds him. He tries to block out the stabbed feeling in his heart as he imagines her helping him through all the papers, she would made it more fun. He chuckles as he remembers how she used to make him study, taking off an item of clothing each time he got a question, and putting back on two items if he got one wrong. And when she had no more to remove, she would give him a hand job if he got five in a row, a blowjob if he got ten, and full on screwed him if he got fifteen. Needless to say, his grades went up pretty damn fast. He chuckles once again as the phone rings. "Hello, Teller Morrow Garage service, how may I help you" he says in a professional way. "Jax? Oh thank god. It's Tara" he knows instantly something's up by the happiness in her tone at him picking up.

"What's up" he asks, and she suppresses a sigh. "An ex member of a gang you recently patched in, Hector Salazar, has me and Wendy hostage in the hospital" she says calmly. "You and Wendy? Why the fuck is she even here... Are you okay?" he asks, and he feels anger shooting through him, as he struggles to remain calm and collected. "I'm fine" she assures him, and he hears Wendy in the background "I'm fine too asshole, seeing as you are so fucking concerned" and he wants to laugh, but this situation is one he can't even smile in.

"I'm at the hospital in the emergency room, one fatality an unknown male. Cops have shown up, but Salazar wants SAMCRO to guarantee his safe passage out of Charming, or else we die" she states, again way too fucking calm for Jax's liking. "Put him on the line" Jax all but growls, and Tara sighs. "I will, but please do not anger him. If you do, it may be me and the baby, or Wendy he takes it out on. You can't let your son lose his mother, and I cannot let anything happen to this baby" she tells him, and he wants to hit something as he realizes she means Wendy is Abel's mom, not her.

"I am sorry for what I am about to say" she whispers, and his eyebrows furrow as he hears Salazar's voice. "Baby, baby I know I know. I will let you speak to him now honey, just please don't argue with him. I love you so much, and I will see you soon" she says in an amazingly convincing voice, even some choked up moment at the "I love you". There's a small rustle as the phone is handed over, and then Salazar's voice enters his ear. "One hell of an old lady you got here, would be a shame for her to meet a tragic end" he sighs in fake sympathy.

As Salazar walks calmly away with the phone clutched in his hand, talking mockingly to Jax, mainly to anger him, Tara and Wendy slide down to the floor beside the nurses station, sitting on the cold hospital floor. They both avert their eyes from the pale dead man lying across from them, a constant reminder he died because they weren't there. "So, nice going on the phone call" Wendy says, and Tara simply nods in response. "And Abel won't lose his mother. I'm going to make damn sure you get back to that kid" Wendy says firmly, and when Tara turns to argue, Wendy's warning look is enough to make her keep her mouth shut. A silence falls over the two women, as each get lost in their own thoughts. "You know, I wanted to hate you. Even before I met you" Wendy breaks the silence. Tara raises a eyebrow. "Why" she laughs, and Wendy sighed heavily. "My husband was still hung up on you. All I heard from everyone who had known you was that you were the only girl he went steady with, and stayed faithful to. I wanted someone, I know now not Jax, to love me with the intensity he clearly loved you" Wendy admits, and Tara squeezes her hand. "If it's any consolation to that small part of you that hates me, he wasn't faithful to me" Tara tells her, and Wendy chuckles. "He expresses emotion differently. He fucked another woman, yes. But he never had feelings for her. He has emotionally only ever had you" she tells her, and Tara nods, surprised that made sense to her.

"You don't have to forgive him right away, but I think you should at least give him a chance for the babies" Wendy tells her, and Tara shrugs. "I don't know" she sighs, and then Salazar returns. It's a few moments of silence until they hear the police's megaphones. "HECTOR SALAZAR WE HAVE THIS PLACE SURROUNDED". Wendy and Tara exchange a glance, and Salazar's face tightens. "Did you fucking call them" he hisses and both females shake their heads. "Firstly you have been watching us all the time, and secondly if there's gunshots, someone at the front desk is required to call the cops before leaving the hospital **(A/n this is not an actual law. Just clarifying)**" Tara explains to him, and he nods sharply.

"This wasn't the fucking plan. They were meant to come later" he growls. Then to add to the mounting tension, the rumble of motorbike engines is heard. "I'm dead. They are going to kill me" Salazar panics, and Tara tries to calm him. But nothing can at that moment, and then he holds the gun towards her, and pulls the trigger.

As soon as the gunshot is heard, another immediately follows. Jax pushes his way to Hale, and Unser. "I am going in. I don't give a flying fuck about the rules and law, I am getting my old lady out of there" he tells them, and they both exchange conflicted looks. "Teller, you can't go in without at least a bulletproof vest" Hale sighs, and Jax grabs it as Clay, Chibs, Opie and Bobby makes their way over to him. A blonde woman runs at them, sobbing. They all realize it's Lyla. "Lyla what are you doing here?" Opei asks first, although the others are all surprised to see her. "Please tell me that Tara isn't in there with a shooter. It is all over the news" she explains, tears falling down her cheeks.

Opie looks physically pained, and nods slowly, as if doing so hurt him. Lyla wraps her arms around Opie and Opie doesn't hesitate as he gathers her into a comforting bear hug. "I'll bring her over to a bench so she can calm down" he says gravely, and Jax nods in approvement. He turns towards the hospital and just as he makes his way to the entrance, Hale grabs his arm. "Stahl. She has been sent back. She's being charged with harassment against the Sons of Anarchy, with an overwhelming amount of evidence and an anonymous donor" he tells him, and Jax feels part of the huge weight in his chest ease. "Thanks" he says genuinely as he walks in the entrance, gun held out in front of him.

He easily makes his way to the emergency room, knowing the route from past visits. He bursts in the door, and almost falls to his knees. Tara lying in a pool of blood, as well as Wendy. Tara seems to have gotten shot in the chest, near her shoulder, and Wendy in the stomach. A man's corpse lies still, long forgotten by everyone. Jax's murderous gaze falls to Salazar who opens his mouth to speak, and without any hesitation Jax shoots at him multiple times, making sure the man who harmed his old lady was dead. He fell to his knees beside Tara, who was breathing heavily. "Oh that hurts" she gasps, and Wendy coughs. "Agreed" the blonde woman groans. Jax hears the cops come down the hall, as Tara's eyes being to flutter closed. "I love you darling" he says, tears falling from his eyes, as she goes still, her chest rising and falling slowly. Hale and Unser burst in, guns raised. "He's dead. Get them help. NOW" Jax roars, losing his last remaining attempt at being calm. He continues to clutch Tara's hand as people swarm around him, and all he is thinking is please don't leave me, please don't die.

**So... Yeah. That's the next chapter! Stahl is gone, so no jail... Tara's shot, what will happen there?! I know. Well I think so, but I might change my mind, it depends on your guys reaction. I know the end is slightly rushed, but overall I am pretty happy with this chapter (ahh I'm Happy, get it?!). I hope you guys reading like it too, because as I said before I am sick and all, and so tired and my mind is foggy. And my cat (Apollo) is being a little asshole today, scratching everyone who comes near him, so I have to stay with him and not let him do his free roaming cat thing, in case he hurts a child. So guess who gets scratched instead?! Moi. That's who. Anyway I had better go before Apollo makes a mad dash for freedom to the kitchen, and if he goes out there... I will never find him... GOODBYE MY DARLING READER! Love you so much!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Oh my lord I am so sorry, I haven't updated in what seems to feel like forever! I really am very sorry! It's been so hectic lately, like literally non-stop problems or errors! I have sat really important exams, been quite sick, got better and then sick again! And while, yes I am still quite sick, but decided I had abandoned this story long enough! I really didn't think it had been this long, time has just slipped away from me! I guess, I mean I don't even know if anyone is still reading this fanfic, I couldn't blame you if you aren't, but if you are thank you so much it means a lot to me! So here's chapter eight, at long last I know!**

**Chapter 8.**

Jax paced the hospital corridor, varying between having his hands clasped behind his back tightly, or placing his hands in front of him and squeezing them together so tightly his knuckles would go white. Gemma sat, staring at the ground distractedly as Bobby made strange noises and matching faces at Abel, who he was holding. Tig was leaning against the wall, for once not making a comment. It's totally silent, the only noise in the waiting room is the hustle of the hospital outside. Clay stands up, his hands behind his head. "It's my fucking fault" he groans, and Gemma shakes her head.  
"A real man takes being fired with a bit of fucking pride. He acted like an insolent child. It's his fault. That prick" she spits out the words like they tasted bitter, her face twisted.  
"Ah guys come on. Doc, she's a fighter. She's not going to let a little piece of bullet sized metal keep her down" Tig says reassuringly, and Lyla sniffles while everyone nods in agreement, an air of momentary assurance being wrecked by Jax.

"And the baby?" he asks, his voice dangerously low but remains steady. Nobody answers the question, but he continues his sentence regardless. "Is that baby a fighter huh? HUH?! That baby, who has had barely even two months in her stomach, is our baby a fucking fighter huh?!" he demands, his stature rigid. The silence following his outburst lasts mere seconds, before Tig answers. "Of course the baby's is gonna be a fighter! I mean with you and Doc as it's parents, fuck, I'd be surprised if it didn't come out on a Harley demanding its first tattoo" he exclaims, and Jax seems to relax, nodding to himself. A comforting silence ensues, as everyone settles down, again lost in their own thoughts.

Jax finds himself thinking about when his dad died. He had been young, he had been about 15, and the thought returning to school that week filled him with a bitter rage. He made it two minutes, before the sympathetic stares and continuous whispering got to him, and he stormed back out. He went to the sports field, it was always fucking empty anyway, and he sat cross legged, head cradled in his hands, as tears just poured down his face. He heard footsteps approach, and a tentative familiar voice call out "You okay?". He looked up to meet Tara's eyes, and just stared. He knew his eyes were ringed in red from his crying, and he probably looked terrible but he couldn't find himself caring as he looked up at her. At this stage in there lives they were not close, not even friends.  
"What are you doing here?" he croaks, and her eyes drift around the empty field, before landing solely back upon him.  
"You were sad, and I saw you storm out so had to follow and make sure you didn't do something stupid to get yourself hurt" she explains, and he's slightly surprised to say the least, he thought she hated him.  
"But you hate me" he states blankly, and she shakes her head.  
"No I really don't. Also nobody should go through what you are. Trust me, I know" she smiles, albeit a slight bit sadly and he is about to snap back at her, before he remembers, her mom died years before.  
"Thanks" is all he replies, and she takes it as her cue to sit down beside him.  
"You're sad" she states. He nods.  
"You need to stop being sad" she continues, and he again nods, now confused on where this was going.  
"I have pot" she concludes, and that's all that needs to be said, for the two teens sat getting high together that day. _The day of their first kiss_, remembers Jax, as she has leaned in and planted one on him, barely giving him any time to respond before pulling away. He had smiled and asked what was that for, and she told him "It was to make sure you would really stop being sad for a few minutes" and it had worked.

On the other side of the room, as Jax wandered down memory lane, Lyla sat rigid, staring intently at the door the doctor was going to walk through. Unmoving, and unflinching, she sat silent, unable to process the fact there was a high chance Tara would not be okay. _She has to be_ her mind screams, and she focuses on Tig's words as like a mantra. "She's a fighter. She's a fighter. She's a fighter" over and over in her head, not noticing Opie's hand clutching her own tightly, or perhaps simply beyond the point of caring. She remembers that Tara ate the last pint of Ben and Jerry's and the first thing they need to do when Tara comes out of surgery, is go get some more. No she'll go get it now and surprise her. No, she'll wait, she couldn't risk not being here when Tara came out. Because she _was_ coming out. In one piece, and she'd be fine and so would the baby. Lyla stays silent, too wrapped up in her head and consumed in her thoughts to notice anything else happening.

"Family of Tara Knowles?" a doctor asks, as he walks into the room. "YES! I mean yes that's us" Jax stands up and approaches him with haste, standing far too close for it to be called appropriate, but the doctor made no move to move away, no matter how intimidated he was by the hulking bikers present in the room, who looked like they could murder him if he dare be the bearer of bad news. "Well, she has pulled through very well, and baby is doing fine. She can go home in a few hours, she's already arguing with the interns about going home immediately" he smiles and everyone laughs, and then hug, Abel being passed over to Jax as he asks. "Can we go to see her?" he begs, and the doctor nods, his pale face regaining some of it's colour as he lead the way towards her room. "Oh shit, how's Wendy?" he asks.  
"Good to know I am an afterthought asshole" a voice jokingly calls out from behind him.  
He turns to meet Wendy's eye, and hers immediately drift to Abel. She smiles at the baby, and the fact he seems completely unharmed. "Tara's in there" she gestures to the room beside her, and he smiles at her, noticing the doctor had seemingly disappeared. He shrugs, indifferent as he focuses on walking to the room.  
The first thing he hears as he walks into the room is Tara trying to convince a terrified young looking guy to let her leave. "I mean I am fine, so is there really a point to keep me in for a few hours, when some really sick individual could have the bed?!" she says sweetly, and the dude looks to the doorway, noticing Jax standing in the doorway, watching the scene. "Well Ms Knowles, you have a visitor so I am just going to leave, and I'll be back in a few hours to check on you" he almost sags in relief as he runs out the door, as Tara's head snaps up to meet Jax's eyes. She notices Abel, and focuses on him instead.

"You want to hold him?" he offers, tentatively walking towards her. She nods wordlessly, holding out her arms, and as the baby is placed in them, she immediately lovingly cradles him, kissing his forehead and cooing at him. Abel burgles with happiness upon being near her, and Jax smiles as he takes in the scene in front of him.  
"I'm happy you got him back" she whispers, and he frowns when he realises she's still acting like she's not his mother.  
"Well, I had to. Our son needs us" he answers, and her eyes drift up towards him tiredly.  
"Jax" she sighs, and he shakes his head.  
"No. You will not claim you aren't his mother, you are as much his mother as you are to the one in your stomach" he insists, and she nods, just agreeing with him for once.  
"He's getting big" she notices, after a moment of hesitant silence."  
"Yeah, he eats like a horse too" he smiles, as he thinks about how healthy Abel is, and how you would never guess by looking at him the shaky start he got in life.

And then Lyla and Gemma come bursting in, followed by a stream of he guys all holding balloons and teddy bears. "Hey Doc!" Tig greets her and she smiles, still holding onto Abel, and Happy speaks up. "Great show you put on at the club. That bitch is still bleeding!" he crows proudly, and Tara blushes.  
"I really am not violent I swear" she insists and Clay smirks as he approaches her. "Sure, but are we forgetting the Prom incident?" he chuckles, as Jax, Gemma and a few members of the club start laughing. "That was.. I was drunk!" she defends, and Lyla speaks up. "What is this prom incident?" she asks, and Opie goes to speak before Tara cuts him off. "A thing that nobody shall ever speak of again" she growls as she glares at him and Opie chuckles, raising his palms in surrender. "Whatever you say Knowles" he winks and she chuckles as she mock glares at him.

About five hours later, Tara's on the way home, in a car with Lyla being driven by Jax. When the car stops outside her house, Lyla gets out and Tara goes to but Jax stops her. "No goodnight kiss?" he asks, eyebrows raised. "Oh yeah you're right" leaning across, and then swerving into the back seat to kiss Abel's cheek. He chuckles as he nods, although he's slightly wounded that she wouldn't kiss him. "Night baby" she whispers to Abel. She turns to Jax. "Night Jax" she smiles slightly and he can't help it. He leans forward and clasps her head gently in his hands, and pulls her slightly forward, making their mouths to collide. He leans into it and for a moment she does to, but then slowly starts to pull away from him.  
"That shouldn't have happened" she whispers and opens the door of the car. "Goodnight Jax" she say, with a tone of finality Jax immediately hated. He doesn't have time to answer before the door is shut and she disappears for his line of vision, and all he can think is _"that has to happen again"._

**End chapter!  
Hello dear reader! You have made it to end of yet another chapter! I apologise it took so long to update! I really do! So if you enjoyed this I am very happy, but if you didn't that is totally fine. It's your opinion honey! Anyhoo, I had probably better be going as I am scheduled to hav a very busy day today (meaning the popcorn's ready and "Girl, interrupted" is starting, for I am watching it for the twenty fourth time), so I best be off! I love you all so much, especially you sweetie! Yes you! Bye darlings!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello there world of fanfiction! How are you dear?! I hope you are well. I am back again, with another chapter! I hope this news pleases you if not I am awfully sorry, but you can just click off now! :) That's fine right? So anyhoo! I missed writing this story so much, and missed you guys so much! How are your lives?! I hope they are intriguing and full of excitement! But onwards with the story dear reader! Hope you enjoy! **

**Chapter Nine.**

Tara grumbles her utter annoyance at Lyla, who was currently tending to her hand and foot, like Tara was some fucking invalid who wasn't capable of taking care of herself. Lyla's point was "_You got fucking shot so shut the fuck up and let me take care of you, you whiny bitch"_, and Tara's numerous complaints had fallen upon stubbornly deaf ears. It didn't help the fact Gemma was demanding Tara come to the clubhouse tonight, for an impromptu party she swore blindly had nothing to do with Jax and her being in the same room together.  
Tara and Lyla had been called to help out put out food and the likes, which Tara was honestly grateful for seeing as Lyla was acting like she was dying, and the hospital had demanded she take a leave of absence. Her numerous attempts at trying to prove she was just fine and was perfectly capable of working was again ignored, and it's with a dull excitement her and Lyla make their way to the clubhouse.  
"So what's going on between you and Opie" Tara asks curiously, as she notices Lyla's hands tighten around the steering wheel.  
"Nothing, but I could ask the same question between you and Jax" she smiles sweetly, and Tara huffs.  
"Nothing. I just want to be able to see Abel" she sighs, sadness slightly present in her tone. Lyla doesn't answer, instead reaches over and squeezes Tara's hand reassuringly.  
By the time they get to the clubhouse, both women not so subtly checks the line of bikes for the one they knew most. From their angle, Jax and Opie's were missing from the lot, which should have been an occurrence both should have been extremely thankful for but instead are filled with a certain disappointment. Tara turns towards Lyla before they exit the car.

"I know I can't get drunk for the foreseeable future, but I do plan on having fun tonight. And so are you. So fuck them two for tonight, girl's night?" she asks, holding up a pinkie finger. Lyla wraps her pinkie around Tara's.  
"Girl's night" she agrees in a soft pleasant tone.  
And with that agreement hanging in the air, the two friends exited the car, and headed over to where Gemma was puffing a cigarette. "Hey there sweetheart" she smiles wirily, her hands automatically stubbing out the cigarette and placing themselves on Tara's stomach.  
Her eyes gleamed, as she stared at the small bump that was forming. Jax walked out the door behind Gemma and noticed her hands on Tara, and then took in the fact Tara was actually here. His face immediately formed into a smile upon seeing her, and the little bump. The kid they made, together, was in there.  
"Jax" Tara greets him, her tone slightly cold. He winces as it registers in his mind, his brain and his heart begging to never hear such coldness in her voice again, especially solely directed towards him.  
"Tara" he smiles, and she feels a shiver going up her spine at his voice's slight huskiness as it wraps around her name. She turns to Gemma, desperate to attempt to pretend that Jax's presence had no effect on her. Gemma smiles reassuringly at her, and pats her hand.

"How's the morning sickness?" she asks, and Tara is relieved with the change of topic.  
"Oh it's getting better! Yeah Lyla's been getting up to comfort me if I am and you know, hold my hair and everything. You'd swear she's this kid's parent" she chuckles, and Jax visibly tenses up, but it seems she's the only one to notice.  
"Morning sickness?" Jax asks, and Tara nods.  
"It was really bad for a while but whatever Johnathon puts into his juice works wonders" she smiles and he frowns.  
"Who's Johnathon?" he questions, and she crosses her arms defiantly over her chest.  
"That really isn't any of your business" she says coldly, and Gemma drags her off into the bar. Lyla smirks at Jax, who's racking his brain for any mention of a Johnathon in her past. He comes up blank, and is left alone, fuming.

Hours later, Tara is holding Abel when his eyes begin to droop, heavy with sleep. "Is the little man tired" she whispers, and she receives a sight gurgle in reply. She hands the baby to Gemma, and tells her that she is going to find Jax, to ask him if he wants her to babysit the baby tonight. Gemma smiles proudly at Tara's retreating figure, and looks down at the grumpy boy cradled in her arms. "Your mama is damn well gonna fight for you baby" she smirks.  
Tara is walking gingerly into the hallway with the Sons own rooms, when a door opens and she's being yanked inside one. _Jax's one to be more precise._ She ends up shoved against the wall, Jax staring down at her, his eyes alight with a fire she hasn't seen for a while.  
"Who's Jonathon and why is he making you Juice?" he hisses, and she almost laughs, until she realises he's being entirely serious.  
"Are you fucking kidding me? You really think you have any right asking why a man I associate with is trying to help me?" she scoffs, but the fire in his eyes does not dim, instead begins glinting even more dangerously.  
"Now is not the time to be fucking around. Who. Is. He" he demands, and Tara sighs.  
"He's a fucking co-worker, who's married, and when he heard I was having morning sickness, offered me this Juice he would make for his wife when she was pregnant to help her morning sickness. All four times she has been pregnant" she spits out the words as though they were venom, and Jax's grip immediately loosens on her wrists. "Oh" is all he can say.  
"That's all you can say?" she scoffs, as if giving up on him.  
"What the fuck do you want me to say Tara?! What the FUCK do you want me to do, because I will do it. Without any question nor hesitation. You want an apology for Ima?! Fine. I'm so sorry for that shit, my mind was fucked from Abel and you and" he cuts himself off, taking a step forward, pressing Tara flat against the wall, his body flush against hers. "You blamed me for Abe getting taken and you fucked Ima to try and get a new family. I get it" she says flatly, and his eyes roam her face, stopping on her eyes as if desperately searching for a trace of the love she once had for him.

"Perhaps at the beginning I did. In a fucked up way, I blamed you. And I was wrong, so so wrong. But I did NOT fuck Ima to get a new family, I am perfectly content with the one I have" he brushes his fingers lightly over her bump at these words, and she realises how close they are together physically.  
"Jax, don't" she says lightly, and his head snaps up, to glance into her eyes. "Why not?! Why can't I touch my old lady's stomach, which is growing MY kid in there? Why can't I kiss you right now" he leant closer "and you just kiss back?" and he closes the gap between their lips, and she loses herself momentarily, allowing her heart to flow into the kiss, and he responded with an equal enthusiasm. But she remembered where she was, and what happened the last time she was in this room and her stomach twisted and she shoved him away, and dropped her gaze from his wounded eyes.  
"No. Not here, never here" she gasps and his face twists into an expression of confusion until realization sweeps over his features, and he has the decency to look ashamed.

"Tara" he began, but she shook her head. "I uhm came back here to see if you want me to babysit Abel for the night, he's tired and grumpy out there and Gemma's dead on her feet. I mean I get if you want him to go to family" she says awkwardly and he nods. "No you're about the only family he needs. Of course you can have him for the night" he nods, and Tara's face breaks out into a grin.  
"Oh thank you! Gemma already put a car seat in my car, you know what she's like" she rolls her eyes, but there's a good natured expression upon her face. He smiles at her thankfully, and just as she goes to walk away he grabs her hand so she's facing him and drops to his knees, his face at her stomach level. He looks at her cautiously as he slightly raises the shirt's material to plant a kiss on the bump that is present. He mumbles a few sentences that Tara can't make out, but she feels like she's not meant to, and he stands up. She nods and walks out, leaving him to sit on his bed alone.

Tara walks out to her car, Lyla already in the passenger's side half asleep, Abel in her arms. she smiles as the baby babbles, clearly fighting the urge to fall asleep. She just has the door open when she hears her name being called. It's Chibs, Bobby and Opie. She smiles at the men approaching, who smile in return. "What's up guys?" she asks, her interest peaking. Bobby clears his throat and awkwardly smiles at her.  
"Look Tara, I'm just saying this, that our dear VP had his head stuck up his ass to even consider losing you, but I'm asking as a friend to the both of you, don't just give up on him" Bobby says his small piece and walks away, swaying slightly from the alcohol he had consumed, and wrapping his arms around two young blonde croweaters, leading them inside.  
"Aye Doc, the man has a point. But that's not what I needed. I just needed to ask would you be available right now for a moment, on the request of Clay" Chibs says, and Tara's head shoots up.  
"Wait what? Clay wants to speak to me?" she asks, and he nods.  
"He said he needs to say something to you. Sounded kinda gravely important, but ya know" Chibs smirked and Tara sighs, looking at the tired baby in her arms.  
"He said meet him in the office, it's quieter. Ya can bring the babba too" he informs her, and Tara nods. Chibs walks away towards the clubhouse. Tara and Opie exchange a look, and she sees he's worried but she tries smiling reassuringly.  
"Look would you mind sitting with her, even in the backseat just until I get back out?" she begs, her eyes falling on the very intoxicated Lyla.

"Yeah, no problem" he says gruffly, and she smiles thankfully at him, before making her way towards the office. The light is already on, so she just walks in and is not surprised to see Clay already standing inside, leaning against the desk.  
"You wanted to talk to me?" she asks, and he nods.  
"Yeah, I did. See Tara, I have begun to love you like a daughter, and you know what that means right?" he asks, and she wrinkles her eyebrows, as she shakes her head, in shock he admitted to loving her.  
"It means you are part of the family. And we are a family that takes care of each other. And you have that little one" he points to her stomach, and then to Abel "And that little one".  
Before he can continue she cuts him off "Clay I don't think you remember but Jax said I'm not family to Abel. I don't have him. He's not my son" she says sadly and he looks at her, his expression soft for once.  
"Horseshit. You and I both fucking know that boy is yours, Jax knows it, hell everyone does. Now I know you and Jax aren't together right now, and that's fine but I have noticed you and Gemma getting closer" he smiles slightly at the thought of his wife. She nods to confirm the validity of his statement and he continues. "So I just wanted to say, if you leave Charming with that little tyke still in your stomach, you are going to break her heart. And a lot of others too" he warns her, there is no threat in his voice, just blunt honestly that's almost scarier.  
"I have no plans to leave. I left once, under entirely different circumstances. This time, I have my education, and there is children involved, so I have nothing to run towards away from here" she assures him, and his face breaks out into a grin, one reserved for family. "Then alrighty" he chuckles as he walks away, and she makes her way back to the car, wanting nothing more than to crawl into bed and sleep knowing Abel is curled up near her once again.

**End chapter!**

**Hello there my dear! How did you like it?! Put a smidge of Jara in there, and a hint of Clemma... A hint. But the real shit is about to go down. Like down the fuuck. I apologise I got quite exited! As I normally do writing this story. But my cat's the way getting all my excitement snuggles and cuddles so, if that's a bad thing then I don't know how to do Life right. Fuck what I am talking about? I am tired leave me alone for the lack of sense I am making right now, insomnia hits the best of us and beats us to a bloody pulp... And on that lovely note, here's where I will leave you off! **

**Goodbye darling! Until next time!**


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